Dorothy_Lucey's Blog

NO ONE YELLS "WHAT ARE YOU WEARING" AT ME...IT'S MORE LIKE WHY ARE YOU WEARING THAT? IT LOOKS LIKE I SHOP AT "INAPPROPRIATE R US". BUT HEY, AT 5AM I JUST GRAB WHATEVER IS NOT ON THE FLOOR OF MY CLOSET. OUR WONDERFUL MAKE UP PERSON (ROBYN) IS ALWAYS HAPPY WHEN I WEAR SOMETHING OTHER THAN BLACK. PEOPLE ALWAYS ASK JILLIAN AND ME ABOUT OUR CLOTHES (MORE JILL THAN ME...BUT HEY SHE DOESN'T BLOG SO YOU'RE STUCK WITH ME ), SO HERE IS MY SCHMATA BLAGA FOR THIS WEEK.

MONDAY...OK I CAN NOT EVEN REMEMBER WHAT I WORE...PROBABLY BLACK CAUSE I ALWAYS FEEL FAT (FROM CANDY FRIDAY AND WEEKEND WINE). SO LETS ASSUME I WORE SOMETHING BLACK AND IT PROBABLY WASN'T ALL THAT INAPPROPRIATE. IT MAY HAVE INVOLVED A SHORT SKIRT BUT YOU CAN'T SEE THAT. OK OUR TRUSTY PRODUCER ELOY CHECKED THE SHOW TAPE. HE JUST SAID, "YOU WORE A BLACK STRAPPY THINGY " IT'S ALL COMING BACK TO ME (ME AND CELINE DION). I GOT THAT ONLINE ON SALE AT NEIMAN MARCUS. IT'S A NICOLE MILLER PERFECT BLACK DRESS HAS RUSHING TO HIDE EVERYTHING (MAYBE MORE COCKTAIL PARTY THAN 7 AM BUT I LOVED IT). OUR DIRECTOR FRANCIS AND HAIR PERSON PATTY ARE BOTH ON LINE NOW TRYING TO GET THE DRESS...IT'S ON SALE HURRY!!)

TUESDAY...ANIMAL PRINT. I WORE AN OFF THE SHOULDER BLUMARINE DRESS. IT'S FROM LAST YEAR AND I THINK I WORE IT TO ONE OF JILLIAN'S BABY SHOWERS. AGAIN NOT REALLY A DRESS FOR THE OFFICE ...BUT AT LEAST IT'S NOT UP MY BUTT. NICE LONG DRESS (THEREFORE STEVE DIDN'T LIKE IT).

WEDNESDAY WAS APPARENTLY MY WEDDING DAY. I WORE A WHITE DRESS THAT I CAN WEAR TO MY NEXT WEDDING. PEOPLE HERE SAID I LOOKED LIKE I WAS JUMPING OUT OF A CAKE OR WEARING A SCRAPBOOK, JILL SAID I LOOKED LIKE I WAS GOING TO A QUINCIENERA . I LOVED IT... EXCEPT IT WAS TOO TIGHT. AGAIN I BOUGHT IT ONLINE. LAST WEEK WE DID A STORY CALLED "B.U.I." ...BUYING UNDER THE INFLUENCE ... WHICH IS SHOPPING AND DRINKING AT HOME. A DRINK IN ONE HAND AND A MOUSE IN THE OTHER AND YOUR JUST A CLICK AWAY FROM ANYTHING YOU WANT. "B.U.I." CAN BE VERY EXPENSIVE PLUS PEOPLE OFTEN BUY A SIZE TO SMALL. APPARENTLY WHEN YOU DRINK YOU SHRINK. I COULD NOT BREATHE SO I'M THINKING THE DRESS WAS A SIZE (OR 2 SIZES) TOO SMALL.

THURSDAY I WORE THE DRESS OUR PRODUCER LISA B HATES MOST OF ALL. SHE CALLS IT THE OH MIGHTY ISIS DRESS. APPARENTLY I LOOK LIKE A SUPER HERO FROM THE 70'S. IT HAS A BIG FAKE JEWEL IN THE MIDDLE. IT'S BY SKY (STORE ON ROBERTSON). IT'S NOT TO EXPENSIVE BUT TERRIBLY HEAVY. YOU GET A WORK OUT JUST WEARING IT.
AND VERY WRONG FOR THE MORNING.

IT'S FRIDAY...SKY AGAIN. A BLACK HALTER...VERY NAKED. SOMETHING YOU SHOULD WEAR CLUBBING... NOT FOR ANY MORNING TV SHOW...EXCEPT OURS.

I TEND TO WEAR WHITE OR BLACK (VERY BORING I KNOW). I LOVE DESIGNER DRESSES BUT MORE OFTEN I SHOP AT H&M, FOREVER 21 AND ZARA... FOR A SPLURGE I LIKE NEIMAN'S AND PLANET BLUE (IN THE BU).

I JUST YELLED TO LISA BRECK "WHAT ARE YOU WEARING". SHE WORE A PRETTY PLUM DRESS ON. I MAY BE WEARING THAT (SO HEY COLOR) ON MONDAY!

BY THE WAY NEXT WEEK WE ARE DOING SOMETHING CALLED "REMEMBER WHEN." WE WILL BE SHOWING OLD PHOTOS AND VIDEOS OF ALL OF US (EVEN LITTLE STEVIE).

SO HERE IS A SNEAK PEAK OF THE DRESS I WORE WHEN I WENT TO THE WHITE HOUSE.



PRODUCER LISA B. SAID IT WAS WAY TOO SEXY FOR A DINNER AT THE WHITE HOUSE, BUT I TOLD HER THAT PRESIDENT JIMMY CARTER LIKED IT A LOT (HE MAY HAVE HAD SOME LUST IN HIS HEART). IN THIS PICTURE I'M WITH AN OLD BOYFRIEND (HEY BOB LINDSAY... HOW HAVE YOU BEEN??) BUT I WORE THE SAME WHEN I WENT TO THE WHITE HOUSE DINNER WITH ALEC BALDWIN (HOW'S THAT FOR NAME DROPPING)?

SO MAKE SURE YOU WATCH NEXT WEEK WHEN ALL OF US (EVEN STEVE) WILL ALL AND SILLY!

     ON THE SHOW STEVE CALLED THIS  "NASH'S BLOG"
 .  I WISH.  I CAN BARELY GET THE KID  TO PICK UP HIS UNDERWEAR.  .HOW COULD I CONVINCE  HIM TO WRITE MY BLOG (I AM NO TOM SAWYER).  BUT I DO HAVE NASH'S REVIEW OF NASH ON TV.   WELL AT LEAST I HAVE THE ONLY THING HE DID SAY ABOUT IT.   I COULD SO EASILY BE KATHY LEE..STAGE MOM...BUT MY TOO COOL  KID WON'T LET ME.   BUT HE WILL ALLOW ...IE... CONDESCEND TO  LET ME TAKE HIM TO IDOL..   WE WENT WEDNESDAY,  OF COURSE WE WERE  LATE, AND NASH WAS ANNOYED.  HE SAID ""ARE WE GONNA MISS  NEIL DIAMOND", THE FUNNY PART IS, HE HAS NO IDEA WHO NEIL DIAMOND IS.  THIS WAS BIG FOR ME I HAVE BEEN IN LOVE WITH NEIL SINCE I WAS 13 YEARS OLD.

WHEN NEIL  CAME OUT TO MEET THE AUDIENCE BEFORE THE SHOW.  HE WAS HAVING A GOOD TIME AND WHEN DEBBIE (THE STAGE MANAGER) SAID NEIL COMES OUT YOU'LL CLAP THEN YOU'LL STOP CLAPPING.  NEIL SAID DON'T LISTEN TO HER ... KEEP CLAPPING ...
I DON;T THINK JASON WAS WORRIED ABOUT GOING HOME.  HE WAS YAWNING DURING THE ENTIRE SHOW.  EVEN THOUGH BROOKE SAYS HE GETS MORE SLEEP THAN ANYONE SHE HAS EVER KNOWN.  I GUESS IT WASN'T A SHOCK THAT BROOKE GO THE BOOT...BUT IT WAS SAD.

NASH'S FAVORITE PART OF THE NIGHT IS  BACKSTAGE WITH THE JUDGES.. THEY ARE SO NICE  TO HIM THAT NASH THINKS HE'S THE SHOW MASCOT.   MUCH LIKE ME...NASH  DOESN'T LIKE TO WATCH HIMSELF ON TV, HIS ONLY REVIEW OF 
 SEEING HIMSELF WAS ABOUT HIS HAIR ... HE DID AGREE WITH ME  THAT HE NEEDS TO  COMB IT ONCE IN AWHILE.  
WE  ALL HAD A GOOD TIME ( EXCEPT FOR TERRI...I WAS CRUSHING HER.) ...TAKE A LOOK ...

Dorothy and Nash Backstage at AI

      Since I am to lazy to write my own blog ...I asked (offered to pay ) our producer Lisa B to write my blog.  She did it for free, but she is trying to nail me.  The following is a bunch of BS from (the evil) Lisa B (not Lisa Breckenridge...her I like)


Dorothy's world of entertainment?

Quote from Dorothy Friday 8:17am ... "I just do what the producer's tell me" ...
Our response ...
As one of the producers of the show ... (Lisa B.)
 First i would like to say "I wish" ....
Here is what really happens every  morning ...or should i say the middle of the night ...
Dorothy and her "people" producer Bill ...( who no matter how Dorothy makes him seem, he is not gay, not that there is anything wrong with it) myself, and many of the morning show producers look thru the wires, newspapers and our favorite gossip websites ... To see what is happening in the world of entertainment ... And since for Dorothy that would include politics, we even look at some real news.... After lots of time and energy producer bill puts Dorothy stories in the rundown ...
I check in with Dorothy at 6am to run through the stories that we feel she would like ... Some are no brainers- what happened last night on American Idol  or who got the boot on Dancing with the Stars ... But everything else, Dorothy are you listening ....
"we are happy to change or not even do", yes we like tabloid Thursday and us weekly Wednesday, probably because of the alliteration, but once again, please feel free to say " i don't want to do" and if you would like to do that segment called "feel good Friday", that is fine, but don't blame us if the celebrities don't cooperate!
Keep up the good work


         *******my  rebuttal to the producer rebuttal
      I  have come to hate tabloid Thursday. ..unless we can make fun of the stories....then it's fun.  Sometimes I do ask to take a story out.   Sometimes producer Bill gets annoyed with me because I will  ask to take out a story about a friend of mine.  It's hell having a few celebrity friends.  Plus I live in Malibu and who wants to do a nasty story about someone and run smack into the at Starbucks.  Bill once (in a cranky voice) asked me who we could do stories about....I said anyone i don't see in the carpool line at school.    It's odd but  sometimes I find
 I talk the least about the stories I know the most about (I really don't think i should talk about things I see at school or church...yes even i have standards),  Steve always says more stars should befriend me.  If a friend of mine does get arrested don't' worry you won't miss it.  I will  just ask  Harvey...from TMZ... To come in and do the story for me.

Ps Lisa B I still love you (both Lisa B's)

Hey when Steve is away.... Jill and I must play ...or torment someone else. It bugs Steve that there is no word a male mistress...so I will just call Mark our "manstress." I do kind of feel like we are cheating on Steve..but hey after 13 years with the same guy...you need a break (I'm gonna try to sell that one to my husband...it's been 13 years with him too!).

We laughed a lot with Mark...but the high point of the week had to be Bill Cosby. Bill was not familiar with our show so he actually watched it (and still came on). He said OK I get it they are all about the funny. So he sits down and Jill and I begin to grill him...about race, about Obama. We were so interested we didn't let Steve get a word in. I asked Bill who he was voting for he said and I quote "none of your damn business." During the commercial break he said you girls are killing me...I was all ready for the funny and I'm being interviewed by scholars. Now calling Jill and I scholars...that made Steve laugh.
If you could hear us during the commercial breaks (and in the future you may be able to...there's some plan to put the audio from the breaks on the net) today you would have heard me complain...about...this blog. Blog,blog, blog...I kept saying I have nothing to say (a blog about nothing...hey it worked for Seinfeld). I am now doing a blog each Friday. I asked our boss..can I please blog when I have something to say. Jose said we tried that and you never did. So now there's a Friday blog no matter what.

Monday Jill and I will be back with our TV husband. We'll send our "manstress" back to the 10pm.

I am here to stick up for Simon...enough about his man boobs. They aren't that big..ok bigger than mine...but not that big. The big shocker on Idol this week... Micheal Johns ...is married!! Apparently that's news to me. See the interview here.

I had such a (bleached) blond moment on the show. And really...Steve has never enjoyed a Friday more. I know Micheal is (sadly) married...but it's Friday. When you get up at 4:30 am (and refuse to ever go to bed before 10pm), you get a little tired (and puffy eyed) by Friday. So I went for the question we ask everybody when we have nothing else to say. Steve wants to turn my goof into a promo...Dorothy Lucey your Idol Expert...

"Michael who are you dating?"

Sometimes I do hate myself in the morning. But I am sad to see him go. I thought he would be in the top 5 maybe even the top 3. This week Producer Bill (go read his blog ...very funny...he gets into the hell of working with me) Bill and I (and Tivo) agreed Syesha was going home. Then when they sang "Shout to the Lord" ( which is beautiful) I noticed the loooong close ups of Carly and Syesha. So then (really over thinking it) I decided neither girl would be going home. Perhaps...like last year, no one would go home. But we...and Tivo, were wrong. When you watch the show Tivo is watching you. They know who you watch and who you fast forward through. Based on that Tivo picks who is going home and they have been right about for a few weeks in a row. But not this time.

This morning Michael said it's better to be a has been... than to be a never was. I don't think he is either. Michael is coming on the show next week...I hear he's bringing his wife!

As much as I want... in my heart to boycott Idol...I'm actually going to the show next week to see Mariah Carey. I know Simon's boob's are smaller than hers!!!!

Oh that was such a sleazy tease! Well...would you expect less from us (or at least from me)? Normally I try to write a funny Friday Blog (well at least I try to make it funny). I usually write about what you didn't see on the air. Today we are not so goofy. We are covering the funeral of the firefighter people called "Lovey".

Maybe it's because I live in Malibu, but I have a lot of friends who are firemen. Also a funeral like this reminds me of my Dad. My father was a cop. I was lucky to have him for a good long time. He passed away 2 years ago...2 years ago yesterday. When I was a news reporter in NY I covered the funerals of so many police officers. In fact I got out of news (and into this silliness that I do) after a cop funeral. It was at St. Patrick's in New York City. The church was packed...at the end of the mass they gave the cop's son...a boy about the age my son is now....his Dad's hat. A big uniform hat ...on this little boy's head. A hat instead of a father. I burst into tears. Now I didn't know the family....but I did know I was taking every news story to heart. I just couldn't do it anymore.

Firemen also make me think of my pretty church that burned down. We are getting ready to raise the money to rebuild...but on Easter Malibu Presbyterian gave $500,000 to World Impact. They are building a teen center downtown, a safe place for kids hang out. I bet you have passed World Impact many times, you can see the sign off the 10 freeway as you head into downtown. World Impact is having an impact on inner city kids. Our church wants to be a part of that and promised the donation last October...October 20th. The next day our Church burned down to the ground. But we honored our commitment.. I do love our church.

Let me just mention our next project (then I promise I'll get back to the silly stuff). The Missions Committee of our church (which I am a proud and loud member of) supports missionaries all over the world. But we are doing something very cool here. Another charity, Imagine LA,  is hoping to get kids off the street. They say there are 8,000 homeless families in LA. There are about 8,000 churches, synagogues, and mosques in LA. Very interesting. They are hoping each house of worship will take one family off the streets. We are going to be one of the first churches to take in a family. You support them...get them off the streets for 2 years...and hope they will never go back. It's a start...our goal is that there will be no more babies sleeping on the streets of LA.

Enough do-gooding...next blog I promise all gossip.

No one complains more than Tony...not even Jillian and me. When Tony sits in we always laugh...and not always at him. Tony is the nicest of us all...but Jill and I somehow bring out the worst in him. He's hungry...he's tired...he hasn't had time to pee in the last 3 hours. This morning he ran up to the vending machines during a break. He ate a bag of Doritos and made it back in time to look (somewhat) professional. Jill smelled something...a rat. Tony tried to deny it...but Jill did a breath smell check. Finally he owned up to it..and gave Jill some money to get more. She actually did not know we had vending machines...let alone where they were. But mission accomplished ( remember the last time somebody said that....) Jill got back in time with 3 bags of Doritos...which wound up on her dress. She had on a strapless dress that she kept adjusting ( none of us are very well adjusted)...the top part was white...now it's white and orange-ish. Now thats a Spicy Hot Dorito..
PS Nash's favorite joke...what kind of cheese is that....Nacho cheese...( OK one of our smarter producers Lisa B just read this and did not get the joke...she is so not smarter that a 5th grader...the joke is ...here I'll make it phonetic...NOT_YO_CHEESE)

Yes I hate myself... especially this morning. Steve says I can't write a blog without saying the word boobs...so let me get this out of the way early... I feel like a boob. During all the Britney talk today all I could think about was me and Brit's little sis. Last night I had dinner with some friends. Three Moms,six kids...it's odd we got to talk at all... but we did talk about Jamie Lynn Spears. My friend Brooke has a little girl same age as Nash. She was telling me how her 9 year old reacted to the news that 16 year old Jamie Lynn is pregnant (child with child). I said "How did she even know". Brooke thought for a sec and said ..."you told her". She heard me say it on the show. I can always say hey it's my job. It's news. Yet I feel sick spreading this news to little kids I love. Steve has always made fun of me for raising my son in a bubble. I don't want to burst other kid's bubbles.

I do not have an answer... not for me or for society. I can look at the tape of those photographers literally ambulance chasing and I could vomit. All those photographers chasing Britney to the hospital. One of them maybe her new guy...the photographer she picked up off the street. They are vultures. Yet I am the one bringing you all the details. We all (ok except for Steve) like to look at the pictures in the magazines. We like the photos...but more and more you're seeing what it takes to get the picture. Today was like the slaughter house. We got to see the making of the sausage... and it's ugly. Yet I am the one feeding it to you.

Since I have no answers...let'ss move on to Iowa. I have thought Obama and Huckabee as more of the VP type. I am not sure if either is ready to be President. But Barack always says look at what experience did for Cheney and Rumsfeld. Hillary may have picked the wrong time to talk up her "experience." As for Huckabee....he says let's take care of the widows and orphans. These are the words of Christ. He is truly a compassionate Conservative..( didn't we think we were getting that last time?).

History making... interesting results...but you know what they say ...as goes Iowa...so goes Iowa. In other words what happens in Iowa may stay there. Onto this Tuesday..and then Super Tuesday.

PS: I am co-hosting "That's So Hollywood" this weekend so even more Britney talk coming you way from me. So I'll hate myself this weekend too!!!!!

It started with 2 startled kids yelling "Somebody is trying to break in the house". 6AM Sunday morning...Nash had his friend Chaise sleeping over. The kids burst in our room (that was fine it was waaaaay too early for anything to be going on in there.) They were scared. They had reason to be. It wasn't a thief it was the fire. Chaise's dad was trying to wake us up. He didn't want to just yell FIRE!!! But why not...our Church was burning, the neighborhood would be next..

We grabbed the kids, the cat, the dog , the geckos and pictures and ran. We watched the fire from the parking lot at Duke's ( a Malibu restaurant I have to plug because they fed us for days).

Nash cried when I told him about our church. I was trying so hard not to cry because I didn't want to scare him but when he started...I started. Malibu Presbyterian Church has been at the heart of our lives ( between Sunday service, Bible study, Preschool, meetings..I think I spend more time there than at home). "THINGS WE LOST IN THE FIRE" is so much more than a movie title now. I know a Church is just a building but it's a building I loved.

We also lost a member of the family (although not one I loved). We...okay...Nash lost one of his pet geckos. Lemon (all our pets have food names Milky Way the dog, Oatmeal the cat, Banana and Lemon the geckos) was lost in my car. Lemon may still be in there (I fear if...he/she...we never knew...if it is still there I will know soon enough!) So we dealt with the fear and the sorrow..and the mess. I ripped up everything in my car looking for the gecko. I dropped and broke a bunch of the frames I had put in my car to save. It was a long smoky day but we got to go home.

Monday morning 5am...FIRE!!!!!!AGAIN!!! When I woke up I could see it from my window...that I really don't care for. Again we ran...dog,cat and one gecko. Monday was so much worse. The fire was all around our house and the homes of the people I love. My husband (David Goldstein from CBS2) and I worked the story together. We haven't done that since we were both news reporters in NY. Well he worked the story, I mostly got on TV and tried not to cry.

I am so thankful. Our house is fine. The only house to burn nearby is a house David and I almost bought. Nash and I made muffins for the fireman. I burned them. I have decided to say thank you by not giving them the muffins.

If your ending is not yet a happy one you have my prayers. And honestly I am sorry I think I was a bit giddy on TV today . Maybe it's the relief.. In my house we are all home...well all except the gecko.

Actually it may have been the other way around. Lauren stuck her boobs in Steve's face (Steve says I can't blog without saying the word boobs so that's for you Steve). Maybe Steve was having a snack, his mid-morning breastfeeding. They did all this during the commercial break...before someone broke the news that we now have web cameras on during the breaks. So enjoy the commercials... enjoy the veal...and the feels!!! Lauren is by the way ...way preggy (5 months) with a little girl!

Any time Steve thought Lauren was zoning out (hey it's 3 hours... and she's on baby number 3 ) he would say " Lauren has a question." Which of course she did not...it was our running gag.

After the show our boss asked Steve if he was cranky today. It may have seemed that way on the air but we laughed (often at inappropriate times) all morning ...somehow when we get along it just seems wrong.

I told way too many vacation stories on the air (maybe that's why Steve was cranky and Lauren was zoning out). But I left out the one about the jellyfish. I think Costa Rica is magic but go there and something will bite or sting you. We were in the water and my (manly) husband said ...hum...he didn't cry or yell just... hum (he's manly and low key). When we got out of the water I saw red marks that went from his foot to is knee. Ugly, angry, red stripes..it looked like he could lose his leg. He thought it was sunburn but it was a jellyfish. When we finally found out Nash was so upset he missed a chance to pee on his Daddy's leg (yes that does take away the sting). They told us it take 3 weeks for the mark to go away so if you see him...say lift your (pant) leg.

I'll leave you panting for more.....

Naked Baby, and half naked Mommy...Ruby and Jilly. The kid has 500 dresses in the closet and she's always naked (although wearing designer diapers). When I got there Jillian was breast feeding so there was nudity everywhere. And bliss everywhere. I have known Jillian for 14 years. I have never seen her like this ...filled with joy and love and calm.

The dogs are pissed but what are you gonna do? Teddy seems like he is on doggie downers. But he still follows Jillian everywhere. When Jill went change the baby the dogs went too.

Ruby looks like a tiny dancer. She is not a chunky baby, she has long fingers and toes. She is the most graceful baby I have ever seen.

Here's the headline...Jillian says she wants more kids. She may do this again right away. Can't wait 'til Steve hears that, Steve will be back tomorrow...but how can we miss him if he won't go away. He was in London yesterday. He was seeing the show Spam-a-lot. I will call him Sir Text-a-lot, He kept texting that he was sitting next to fans of Good Day LA and they wanted to know all about the baby. I think Steve was at the show knowing the better show was going on in The Valley. Kids are free...non stop entertainment.

You can meet Ruby tomorrow. (Wednesday 9am). She will be on the show with Mom and Dad.

Steve says I always start with something lurid to lure you in. Something like say... Boob Soup. It's a term I learned on my Houseboat trip. When you have several hot ( usually enhanced) girls in a hot tub...you got Boob Soup. We had a hot tub on our Houseboat...it usually had 12 kids in it. At least the dogs never jumped in . Twenty six people, 12 kids, 7 dogs (6 Mom's in the photo, I'm...which ever one you think looks good) all on 2 houseboats. It's fancy camping (although today I have a weird skin thing, and I broke 2 nails and the bathrooms didn't always work...so it's semi-fancy camping). At the end we ran out of water...it practically turned into "Survivor." 114 degrees...no water ( but we still had beer...that's what happens when the Dads shop). Low on bottled and running water we bathed and washed our hair in the Lake.

At this very moment Steve is getting his hair washed (in a sink what fun is that?). So tomorrow will be hair cut day. He's going to see Baby Ruby today. So Grandpa Steve and Ruby photos tomorrow.

I'll leave you with a photo of the love of my life (Nash) jumping off a cliff...I didn't pay him (like they do in Mexico) but I did pray...then I did a jump. So sad we missed the photo of me.. See you on TV.

Jillian's baby is ...not yet here. Jill is home. Pretending to relax. The last two weeks of pregnancy are slow...like Larry King/Paris Hilton slow.

They bumped (see it's all about the bump) Michael Moore for that crap...I mean for that interview. I got to talk to Michael this week. I got to wait 2 hours to spend 4 minutes with him. That's why I hate junkets. I was forced to gossip with Sam Rubin for 2 hours..while Michael is doing what... hair and makeup? I asked all the important questions...like why he thinks Hillary is sexy. In "Sicko" he says Hill is sexy (that's sicko...but in one photo she does look good). Still Hill won't love this film. He slams her. I asked him if he would vote for her. He said I am not yet supporting anyone. He's hoping one guy will get in the race. He said I won't say who but ...he was right on the war... right on the environment. I said Fred Thompson? Either he thinks I'm a riot or he thinks I work for the other Fox. I was introduced to him as Dorothy Lucey from Fox. He made a face so I said I'm from little local ( sometimes somewhat liberal ) Fox. In the movie Micheal goes on and on about the glory that is France. Bill O'Reilly is gonna love it.

In the time it took to blog...still no Jill update. She' s got about a week till her due date.

Lauren Sanchez sat in for JIll this week.. Lauren is lovely. You can just stare at her face...unless your a guy then your looking elsewhere. Next week it's Lisa Breck. See you then!

OK, so she didn't actually fart (and I tell my son not to use that F word...in my house we say toot). Rosie didn't toot on TV... but the sneeze on the blog was bad enough. It's the Bud and Booger blog (she was drinking and sneezing). Our show producers didn't want us to show the sneeze but I kept bugging them. Rosie sneezed in her shirt. Who sneezes in their shirt? Even my before mentioned child uses his hand...then usually wipes it on me. I'm thinking if Rosie is so free to sneeze ... tooting on TV could be next. That is... when she comes back to TV. We won't have her on "The View" anymore...but at least we still chat on line. One of our producers...I'll call him "John"...'cause that's his name. "John" has been sending little online love notes to Rosie. Yes this is the same "John" that voted twice for Sanjaya (and took this photo with Sanjaya when he was supposed to be working at the finals). John is dealing with the loss of 'Idol' by bothering Rosie (like correcting our scripts wouldn't keep him busy enough). Remember Rosie's big fight with Elisabeth? Rosie said I don't want to fight 'cause people will say "big fat loud lesbian Rosie " is picking on "cute innocent Christian Elisabeth." John wrote to Rosie "which part of big fat loud lesbian isn't true?" I get a lot of that same "love" from "John". I said to him "on our show I'm kind of the cute innocent Christian." He said I'm not all that cute.

This is very not cute. I noticed In the rest of the staff photos taken on the red carpet at Idol...I noticed I have a NPL. Noticeable panty line. Here are a few photos taken by Heather Russell. Heather is our talent booker. Heather begs famous people to come on our show. Here's Heather with us, a photo of the before mentioned panty line. And one to prove what you already knew...Simon is SMOKIN' HOT.

Yes that's a bad name for a church trip. If you don't know MILF stands for Mom's I'd like to...be friends with...or something like that. This weekend I went to Mexico with some of my angel like (yet hot)  girlfriends. Our church group ( about 50 of us) built 3 houses on one Street. We work with Baja Christian Ministries. We paint, we drywall, we deliver food and we pray.  This is  some of our group with a bunch of the local kids.  Seven  friends ( Left to right Nichole, Dayna, Karen, Inga, Brooke, Indy and Julie, me)  nine kids ( London, Madison, Cajun, Jackson, Hayden, Hunter,  Britty,  Nash and Zuzu)  and my Mom (Mom is next to me in the black). Mom had her first Margarita...hey you have to do something when the sun goes down.

On Saturday I painted one of the houses with a bunch of the kids. Yes I was Tom Sawyer and made them  think they wanted to do  most of the work. The kids used some of the extra wood to make a cross for the home. I swear ( shouldn't swear ...church trip) I didn't suggest the cross. They made it with some extra wood, they painted it and gave it to the people. Oh the people. We met a mom with 5 kids. All younger than mine. She had a one week old and a 9 mt old. She had her last baby  by herself in her home, not doctor, no hospital, no husband.  The photo below is of  2 of her children.  So one  week after having her baby this Mom is in church  ( a small shack that is a local mission). Maybe she wanted to pray or maybe she needed the food and diapers we were giving away. Our kids prayed with those kids. Then our kids showed them Bowling with Barbie ( you throw a Barbie at a wall...hey they are kids.)

It took about 6 hours to get home ( almost 3 hours at the border). But 10 minutes away from San Diego you have what Bono calls stupid poverty. We build basic shelter, 3 rooms, no running water ( we build the house they dig the outhouse) but at least they no longer sleep on a dirt floor. They get a roof and a floor. You get blessed in ways you can not imagine.

If you want to spend a weekend changing lives ( yours and others) log on to www.bajachristian.org  They have built over a thousand houses in Mexico.  The goal is to build 10,000 in the next 20 years.

Oh and here are some of our photos....I want to thank my girlfriend Brooke Bohm.   She is a great photographer ( I felt like I had my own personal paparazzi). She took all the good photos ( the rest I took) and she spent her birthday in Baja. Man it's tough to get a candle in a margarita.